OK. So, I was heartbroken all weekend to have run out of stories. I love these stories. This project is a reminder of how much love matters and how deeply love is supported by our community. The antagonists have one argument they repeat: If you have rights, my rights will be cheapened. But we have love stories. Stories of friendship. Stories of devotion. Stories of equality. I read these and my chest breaks open. I read these and I love harder. Thank you for sharing them. Meet my guest for today’s Marriage Project:
I grew up in a Catholic family: we went to church every Sunday and I went to Catholic schools my entire life. We never really talked about gay people and so when I started having feelings for other boys I hid it from my family and the world. I thought there was something wrong with me and that I was a flawed human or a sinner. Since we never talked about it I didn’t know that I had gay family or that one of my cousins was living with a man who he had been dating for a very long time. After I graduated from Gonzaga, I thought that I would find a girl and settle down and just try to be “normal”. I have had girlfriends I cared deeply for, but never felt like I was giving them my entire self. I was cheating them and myself out of being truly happy.
I met a couple (a gay couple) who took me under their wing and showed me that two men can be happy together. They helped me find who I truly am and helped me come out of the closet. My family took it surprisingly well. I make jokes with my mom about me being gay when I was little since we loved to listen to Stevie Nicks and watched some of the “gayest” movies I can name, but she said that she had no idea.
Anyways, this is supposed to be a story about love not my entire life so I’ll get into my love life. After many attempts at finding love and failing, I met the boy of my dreams, and not what I would have pictured the boy of my dreams to be. He is nothing like me; he likes video games and anime, and I like Cher and going out to gay bars. As I am writing this he is blasting the soundtrack to Lord of the Rings, nerd!! Jean-Pierre is everything that a companion should be. He is loving, caring and puts up with me!! We have been together for 2 years. I know that may not sound like a horribly long time, but to me it seems like ages. I have never been with someone that long and felt like nothing has changed since the moment we met. We still annoy friends with how cute and playful we are. We still do everything together and most importantly we still love each other.
I would never have thought that I would want to spend the rest of my life with the same person, but now I do. Don’t get me wrong we are several years away from getting married and starting that phase in our lives, but it will happen someday. I am so happy to have the best boyfriend in the world. Someone who would go to the ends of the world for me and not complain about it. Someone who will put up with me singing “If I Could Turn Back Time” in the shower EVERY morning. He is the love of my life and I hope that we will be sitting on our porch in our rocking chairs when we are 70 and still feel the same way. I can’t wait for our children to visit us in our nursing home with their kids. I can’t wait to spend everyday with the person I love. And we all should have that right: whether or not we decide to use that right should be up to us not the government or religion. I want to thank JP for being himself 100% and never letting anyone get in his way. I am the luckiest person in the world and love him with all my heart.
Danny Hawkins
Spokane, WA
