After watching the entirety of Ken Burns’ Baseball documentary — including the tenth episode that covers the Red Sox winning the 2004 World Series and the pervasive steroid scandal — what I find most compelling about this fascinating history is Roger Angell’s comment that over time devotees realize baseball is about losing and not about winning. I think the repercussions of that single sentence will wash over me for the rest of my life.
That’s a telling philosophy. To know that this thing you love is about losing. About everything associated with losing. Disappointment and perseverance. Heartbreak and error. It’s about the times things don’t go your way, rather than the times they do. Such a philosophy is the ideal way to guard against privilege. Against being a douche. Against this awful certainty that we’re owed anything.
Are we passionate about our failures? Are we? Inside the experience of losing is the desire for better. For improvement. I learned most about myself during a break up. I felt everything shatter and I thought, “When I build this again, I know what I’ll do differently.” You learn more when you lose. You learn what you took for granted, and what you do well, and what needs work. You learn to start again. Or, you know, you don’t. Maybe you just hang out there and get bitter. But I’m hopeful for you. I’m hopeful for all of us. Sometimes we get nearer to success than other times. Sometimes the best thing that happens all day is that awkward goodbye kiss that doesn’t quite catch our mouths. We should maybe put a little more into that next time.
Jill, I’m watching Ken Burns’ Baseball yet again on NetFlix on my iPad, and that Angell quote hit me like it hit you back in February. Unfortunately, I can’t find the exact quote on the Internet. Your reference is all I could locate after many Google searches.
Do you have the exact quote?
I don’t remember the exact quote, Ray, but I came across this on my brief search and thought you might enjoy it: http://thestacks.deadspin.com/an-interview-with-roger-angell-they-look-easy-but-th-506833869
Thank you, Jill. I searched through my DVD’s of Baseball, found, and transcribed the quote: “I think that losing is what baseball is all about in the end. We think it’s about winning, but as we go on as fans, and even as players, we discover that there is much more losing in it. After all, the batter only succeeds one third of the time at best. And this runs very deeply in baseball. As the season goes along fans realize that their hopes are not going to be fulfilled. Once again they’re going to be heartbroken at the end.” – Roger Angell in Ken Burns’ Baseball
It’s even better than I remember. Thanks for tracking it down.